Arrested ‘ape man’ says Elvis was his brother

A Florida man accused of flashing a handgun at a woman told police who arrived on the scene that he was half orangutan and "needed to call the 'Fusion Center' to ask about his monkey blood," according to the Naples Daily News.

He also claimed to be Elvis Presley's brother (Elvis was part ape?) and told the arresting officer "that he had jurisdiction over me since he was the director of the CIA," the officer wrote in his report. We would agree with the officer's assessment that "it did not appear as if he was all there mentally," but we admire his delusional creativity.

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