Blonde's solo sex show on highway doesn't go ignored

A Florida woman decided to engage in some consensual sex with herself last night, which normally we'd say was her pleasure and privilege, except she allegedly conducted her 30-minute "ménage-a-moi" session alongside a major highway. It was hard for traffic to find some release as rubber-necking drivers made illegal U-turns and honked repeatedly at the 35-year-old blonde woman, clad only in a pink shirt. When officers were at last called to the scene, she reportedly resisted arrest with a bite and a kick, but was ultimately wrangled into a county jail, though no bars could truly contain her lower regions, which the saucy public offender continued to flash at officers. Between this and the face-eating, perhaps we're all better off driving down Florida highways with our eyes closed.