Though the sequester is cancelling White House tours and bringing down democracy and so forth, the National Science Foundation shook the couch cushions and found $384,949 to fund a Yale study called "Sexual Conflict, Social Behavior and the Evolution of Waterfowl Genitalia." If you're interested, it turns out that yes, age, environment and breeding changes can affect the penis length of certain breeds, including the Mandarin duck and the Laysan teal. So there's that. The grant abstract tells us that "Broader impacts of the research will be international, national, local and personal," to which we can unequivocally respond, on behalf of everyone in the country, "No. No they will not." [Source]
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