The iciest sidewalk on Earth will be the downfall of us all

The name's Duke, Duke Street. It's frigid here in Norwich, England, and a sidewalk like me can use a little sand to cover up against the cold. But do these people care? No. They think they can walk all over me. Well, go ahead and try. Sure, a few might slither and slide by, b't then — boom! — down goes one guy. And another — twice! Ha! You don't think it's funny? Of course it's funny! Watch that guy's three pals laugh their asses off when he falls. Crash, bang, splat — three in one group! Don't mess with  me, people. Your walking sticks are helpless against my gelid wrath.

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