Lame scientist's research is bogus 98.6 percent of the time

Science is so much more fun when you don't have to bother with, well, science. This important discovery was made by Dr. Yoshitaka Fujii, whose research into anesthesiology seems to be nothing but gas. An investigation by a Japanese professional panel reveals that the former Toho University scholar falsified data in at least 172 of 212 papers he published over the course of 18 years. In fact, only three papers (1.4 percent of the total) could be corroborated, and he even forged signatures of purported co-authors. This has vaulted Fujii into the all-time lead for scientific papers retracted -- an unofficial title that seems credible enough, as long as the good doctor wasn't in charge of collecting that data.