Reading a hit erotic book out loud isn't easy -- just ask Ellen

In a sketch shown on her show yesterday, Ellen DeGeneres tried to narrate "Fifty Shades of Grey," the insanely popular soft-core novel that even your mother is probably hiding beneath a stack of Better Homes & Gardens magazines. DeGeneres' attempt at erotica is, of course, hilarious, especially as she tries to enhance the text by doing her own sound effects, expressing mock horror at some of the passages ("I don't think you should use a spatula for that; if you go to Anastasia's house, don't eat the pancakes!") and replacing naughty words with tamer ("ball-peen hammer") substitutes. "Maybe I'm not the right person for this," she finally admits. Oh, but we think she is.