Simon Cowell says he's too selfish for marriage or kids

Sorry, ladies. Simon Cowell is definitely not holding auditions for a new fiancée. The "X Factor" and former "American Idol" honcho says he's never going to get married because he's "difficult to live with," "selfish" and "quite weird," and consequently no one would want to marry him anyway. He doesn't think he'll ever have kids either, he admits, not that he's too broken up about it. "I'm not sure if I could deal with the 'ga ga goo' thing," he said. "If they could be born at the age of five, I'd quite like that." In other news, a woman in London was banned from going near Cowell's house after she pleaded guilty to smashing a window with a brick. We wonder why she did that.