Texas green lights hunters desperately seeking Sasquatch

Many have dreamed of finding the "missing link" between man and beast known as bigfoot, to prove an undeniable connection on this good green Earth between the innocence of animals and the nobility of man. And others want to find bigfoot, kill him, stuff him and hang him on a wall. One of the latter party recently contacted Texas game officials to ask if it was legal for him to murder Sasquatch. Texas gave him the green light, letting him know a "non-protected nongame animal may be hunted on private property with landowner consent by any means, at any time." Any concerned crypto-zoologists out there had better step up efforts to find bigfoot before some proud Texan turns him into a coat.